I've been wanting to write about Acts of Kindness for a while now. The thing is, we are all so beautifully impacted by simple acts of kindness...when we are the receiver of them - the response is instantaneous. You see or feel immediate lightness, openness, a smile, a feeling of love and warmth. The giver has equal satisfaction as do the observers. There have been many studies that show how positively impacted we are, even by merely watching an action of love like 2 people hugging. Similarly, an un-kind act can have the opposite affect where you almost see the smiles and energy of the person or people leave like the popping of a balloon. It's all energy, folks...quantum physics at work.
Years ago, a friend sent me a hand-made wall flower garden, little throw pillows and matching placemats...all made by him...all given just because. These gifts lasted YEARS...and literally every time I looked at these gifts, I smiled...I felt loved and I remembered my friend Glen. In that remembering for that moment, I believe that in the quantum field and literally throughout the years of living across the nation from one another, it kept us positively connected and I believe the blessing I continuously felt transferred to him each time I saw or used the gifts.
Recently, I was the witness of an act that was not so kind. I walked into a local coffee shop where a man was yelling at the lady behind the counter...counting pennies and dimes because the change that was given was incorrect. She had accidentally put in $5 and change instead of the $10 and change that was given to her and was attempting to make it right. This man made an enormous deal about it...and ultimately, holding it together, the lady said...let me buy your coffee...it's on me...I didn't mean to upset you. He was so taken aback by the generosity but nonetheless did not apologize and walked away. I stood in front of the 'deer in head lights' look on her face and watched the strength that she summoned after that intense interaction...wash away. Her shoulders fell and tears began to stream. I was so moved by the emotion, I, too, began to fight the tears...I told her to take a moment...and that I would be fine waiting (truth is, I needed a minute also...I thought...why am I crying...this feels crazy). It made what was to be a good even great day into one that left this woman and the people around her feel upset. It was a simple mistake and one that in the big picture was really NOT a big deal. In that experience, we were all impacted even the patrons who walked in after the incident as the type of care they would have gotten wasn't available while the lady continued to process her feelings...getting my order incorrect, giving away more free drinks and so on. (Not so great for the business either).
Our mood, how we feel, the things that affect us are projected out all the time. Once aware, we can choose how and what we project out into the world. In an act of being kind and compassionate for that simple mistake, that man could have actually shifted the energy completely in the whole coffee shop. Simple acts of kindness can make a huge impact. We may not always be aware of it...but if this is just an example, I'd say it's well worth it.
This leads me to a whole other topic that I will cover another time...which is, How do you pull yourself back to the present moment even when something has 'side-lined' you? A little of anything can go a long way...much more empowering and joyful when it is kindness but how do you do it when you woke up on the wrong side of the bed or something else in your life is stressful? Stay tuned.
...back to Acts of Kindness...
My sister has a friend who goes through the Starbucks drive thru almost daily and at least once a week...she pays for whoever is behind her...as a 'pay it forward' act of kindness. She never knows their response but has a satisfaction that she made somebody have a little bit better of a day! I LOVE this idea. It is so simple and how fun would that be to have a surprise gift just because.
How many times have you received a FB post, a text or an email with a little note that says, I'm thinking about you and/or I just want you to know that I love you. Instantly, you have warm fuzzy feelings. It makes you know that you are important enough to not only be thought of but to have someone take it a step further to express it. It feels awesome! Recently, I've been desiring to take it one step further.
I often think of people from my past and my present who I love so much...I cherish who they are, the memories we have shared and wonder how they are. I even sometimes think about sending a little 'love' package just because. I used to do this for friends and family...send a little care package with a note. It has been years...maybe even decades since I have done this on a regular basis. And while my intentions have been there...life gets busy (enter in your reason/excuse) and it just hasn't happened. What a bummer for these fabulous people not to know FULLY how much I think about and love them.
Recently, I received a gift in the mail. A gratitude gift that was for me and Dr. Abby. This woman gave us each a mug with $100 bill in it, a teavana loose tea cup/steamer and a delicious bag of loose leaf tea. She wrote a note stating her tremendous gratitude for the work we do, the dedication we have to making people better and healthier and gave an explanation for each thing in the care package box. Everything was SO meaningful and the thought that went into the gift was tremendous. Going beyond just an email or a card and sending such a thoughtful gift IGNITED me to want to do this for others. It made my heart open wider and sing a little louder. It made me feel full and blessed. It inspired me to want to take the one step further so I can make people I care about feel the way I was made to feel. My plan: Make a list. Think about what they might like as a gift or what feels meaningful to me to give to that person or group. At least once per month, choose someone and make it happen!
How often to do you actually show up in kindness with purpose to make strangers or the people you love feel important and like they matter??? Try it! Let us all know how it goes...how it feels to be both the giver and the receiver of these small or large acts of kindness.
Ignite Your Fire! Spread Your Love and Light!
Dr. Cari J.
Love you to infinity!
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